Why You May Have Unwillingly Mastered the Art of Worrying

Man standing alone looking through window

Something’s seriously wrong and you want answers.

You’re sick and tired of hospital visits and you won’t know your lab results until next week.

But the anticipation is torture.

You’ve got this massive swell starting to sink its teeth deep inside you. The feeling is unmistakable.

You’re feeling down. With a melancholy sigh you acceptingly mutter, “Oh geez, here we go again.”

Nope, it’s not the extreme tightness in your chest but this heavy blanket of worry you’ve manifested so effortlessly.

You wanna escape the drama, but realize it’s already part of you.

Normal sleep is non-existent. Tossing and turning each night and glancing at your clock every hour is your new normal. Because worst case scenarios are constantly playing on repeat.

Your gut feeling tells you bad news is heading your way. You accept the possibility your health is in jeopardy without knowing all the facts.

This premonition engulfs you and the funny thing is…you allow it. Because every attempt to push it away has failed miserably.

Regardless of how many times you’ve recited positive statements, those affirmations appear useless.

You feel powerless.

If you’ve discovered you bought a one-way ticket to Worryville as a permanent resident, please don’t lose hope.

You can still plan your escape.

How Over Caring Morphed Into Worrying

You’re a very caring person. Someone who deeply loves their family and who’d do anything to protect them.

You pray everything is safe and sound in this unpredictable world. But it feels like the odds are stacked against you.

Fear-of-the-unknowns, sour relationships, employment problems, unsafe travel, health issues, just to name a few. Take their toll.

It’s a breeding ground for panic and fear you’ve dealt with to this day.

You’ve cinched that safety belt tighter…and tighter…and tighter. So much so you’re incapable of unwinding or loosening up.

Now you’re taking things too far. You mind-map every negative outcome possible. Created out of pure fear.

But it’s not your fault. No one teaches you how to dial your anxiety back a notch.

Woman scared hiding behind bed sheet
Photo by Alexandra Gorn on Unsplash

Make a Choice to Turn Things Around

Every single problem we encounter, no matter how lost and hopeless it may seem at first, exists a hidden pathway through this dense forest of uncertainty.

In other words: No matter how life mercilessly slams you down. There’s a lesson to be sought. And you possess the fortitude to learn and grow from it.

Go Ahead and Worry, But For a Limited Time Only

There’s a small window where you’ve got a free pass. That’s only at the initial stage.

Whatever worry arises, it’s okay to experience it. In fact, embrace it with your heart.

Just be careful not to ignore it.

Problems start to simmer when you let it sit on the back burner and do nothing. Think of it as your Check Engine Light.

So look under the hood and run your diagnostics.

Understand the Three Kinds of Worry

Controllable worry: You taking action on a predicament and physically altering its end result by any means necessary.

Uncontrollable worry: Any predicament that is physically out of your control or without direct influence to any persons involved.

Controllable/Uncontrollable worry: A combination of both.

When you start to feel overwhelmed, try to differentiate which kinds they are. Rather than lumping them all together. You’ll achieve better focus and strategy.

Stop Dumping Fuel On Your Fire

Here’s a little tidbit.

Worries don’t originate from you.

They never have. They have to come from somewhere else. You’re not born thinking negative out of the womb.

Worries are something you amass over time.

You don’t allow thugs to walk in the front door and paint graffiti throughout your home. Right? Then you must also think the same and forbid toxic thoughts from violating the sanctity of your mind.

Stop watching dismal news on TV. Don’t read depressing articles online. Turn off the radio in your car if it’s dragging you down.

Spend more time with positive people. Read or listen to self-improvement books. Watch inspirational movies. Listen to uplifting music.

You are the total sum of the environment around you.

Learn To Be Positive Without Sounding Negative

When you say “Don’t worry”, or “Don’t mess up”, what you’re truly saying is: “You WILL WORRY” and “You WILL MESS UP”.

Why? Because your subconscious doesn’t care about the Don’t part of it. It ONLY hears the worry or mess up part.

Here’s an example. Please repeat this statement twice: “Don’t think of the word Hapless.”

It’s obvious you’re thinking of the word Hapless no matter how many times you’re telling yourself not to.

And here’s the thing. It doesn’t really make sense because the word Hapless does not exist in the dictionary. It never did. So unfortunately you won’t find Hapless anywhere.

You might be scratching your head with that last paragraph? Of course the word Hapless exists in the dictionary! I want to make a point that no matter how many negatives you throw at it, Hapless becomes the center of attention.

The Lesson of the Day: The word Don’t or any of its variations (Never, Won’t, etc.) are useless when it comes to positive affirmations.

Instead of saying “Don’t worry” or “Don’t mess up”, it’s actually better to say “Think Positive” or “Improve and get better” respectively.

Visualize Fairy Tail Endings Only

Remember the law of attraction? It applies here big time especially when you have no physical control of the situation.

Aim beyond a half-full glass. In fact, conjure up a full glass.

Create in your mind’s eye how fruitful you wish the outcome to be. Make it as vivid and detailed as possible. Don’t worry about the how part of it. Just visualize the desired result.

Practice, practice and practice some more.

Remember you’re creating a monumental shift in your life. Give yourself time. You’re creating new neural connections from assimilated behaviors.

Thus your mind will perceive this as a real memory. Why? Because studies show the brain can’t tell the difference between an imagined or real experience.

You can train your brain into thinking you’ve experienced this already. Not only will your worries dissolve, but you’ll feel confident in your ability to tackle any situation because you’ve already done it before. Albeit, from your mind.

Be Proactive and Tie Up Loose Ends

Devise a strategy for worries you feel you can control.

You’ll lessen the brunt of your worries simply by having a plan of attack. All your anxieties can melt away just by focussing on the target.

You could study for a test, discover new ways to improve your health or look for a better job. But don’t procrastinate. Apply yourself now, and peace of mind will follow.

Laziness is the enemy of worry.

Don’t be a sailboat. Letting the wind take you for an aimless ride.

Instead, take charge and navigate to your destination with purpose.

Your Ego is Betraying You

Ahh yes. The Ego. Its superpower is the ability to cause disruptions. Or disagreements with friends and foes. Spark road rage and to a larger scale…wage wars and topple cities.

So what do you think it does to you?

Your ego will make you doubt yourself. It’ll knock you down and inflame your worries. Yup, It’s that inner voice throwing your hope and faith under the bus.

Your ego can be one of your biggest obstacles in life. And you wouldn’t even take notice unless you’re cognizant of it. Funny isn’t it? Something a part of you can wreak so much havoc.

However, there is one true reason for its existence. And it’s not about getting that costly premium package added to your brand-spanking new car.

Your ego is supposed to teach you tough daily lessons. THAT’S IT. But ONLY if you keep it at bay successfully.

It’s akin to a dog eat dog relationship.

Either put it in its place or it’ll put you in yours.

When you catch yourself thinking negative, admit it’s your ego talking. Let it go. Then love and show gratitude for yourself.

Take Baby Steps and Diffuse One Worry At a Time

Sometimes you question how your life maintained a low point for so long.

And why you felt trapped or helpless. Why your worries always felt like they might come true. As if they can forecast the inevitable destiny you desperately want to avoid.

Now, you can turn that conundrum on its head. Because you’ve got a starting point to take charge and shift your perspective.

When you’re ready, you can use these steps to rid yourself of old ingrained patterns.

Then make the wise decision to practice for the long haul. Doing so will pay a lifetime of dividends for you and your loved ones.

Imagine yourself using all your fear-based thoughts as stepping stones.

Transforming each challenge into a springboard for more spiritual growth. Knowing life is actually a series of countless learning experiences that lead up to a new & improved, as well as a wiser you.

Worries don’t have to dictate your life anymore. See yourself as what you’re truly capable of.

An unstoppable force conquering obstacles life throws at them.

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